The desire to change

You can make a change by changing the situation or by changing your behavior. But change is difficult. Without the desire to change, an attempt is pointless.

What is change? According to the Fat Van Dale change has 2 meanings:

  • make / change differently;
  • be different.

In short, changing is therefore a situation or changing one's own behavior. Two great principles for every coaching project. Because something has to change to achieve your goal, otherwise it would work without a coach.

Rusted in patterns

Every person has a whole range of patterns in his backpack. And that is not a problem at all. A cartridge is an automatic response to a particular situation. A lot of patterns are functional, because they make you do a lot of things without thinking about it. Our brains love that repetition, because then they don't have to exert so much effort. And that's quite nice! At least most of the time. Because sometimes such an automatism is a bit troubling.

In my neighborhood they are rearranging a street. Right in the middle of a route that I cycle almost every day. That's why when I leave home I have to go left instead of right. Certainly in the beginning I sometimes ended up before the impeachment because I started the worn-out route fully automatically. Recognizable?

But not all patterns are harmless, because patterns can really work against you. For example, the urge to snack after a bad day or the always allergic reaction to that one colleague when she notices something. These are patterns based on a negative emotion, such as stress, anger, fear or sadness.

The will to change

Patterns are often the obstacles to your attempts to achieve new goals. So patterns that have to be broken.

You would like to start your own business. But after 2 years of thinking about it, you have not yet taken a concrete step. You want to get started with it, but how? Every time you decide to spend a Sunday afternoon on it, you end up with a bag of chips and Netflix on the couch. Ultimately, you decide you've waited long enough and now want to make your dream come true. You hire a coach who will work with you to investigate what actually prevents you from taking steps yourself. After a few conversations you come to the conclusion that you are unsure whether you can actually do it. You will get started with this and you will be at the door of the Chamber of Commerce in no time.

A change is almost always necessary to achieve a goal. And that change almost always lies in breaking through an obstacle, such as a pattern. But before you can break through that barrier, you must first discover the barrier. Then you have to recognize and accept him. Only then can you actually get started with removing the obstacle.

This search is usually a search for yourself. You also have to learn to look at yourself. From different angles. This creates the awareness that is necessary to take matters into your own hands and to change them. Then comes the question: do I change the situation or do I change myself?

Change the circumstances

You can look for the change outside yourself. So by doing something about the circumstances in which you find yourself or where a problem arises.

It's been messing around at work for a while. It is not the case between colleagues in your department and the management does not seem to really want to do anything about it. It makes you unhappy and stressed. You want to change that and you decide to do this rigorously by looking for a new job.

Note that a change of circumstances does not always solve everything. If the impediment is all or part of yourself, you are likely taking it to that new job. Then nothing appears to have been resolved.

Change your behavior

You can also choose to change your own behavior with a result that works in your favor.

You've had the same job for a few years now and it's starting to get a little boring. You want to be challenged again. Just like in the previous example, you could look for another job. But you would like to stay because it is such a nice organization. You can of course indicate to your manager that you want something different and then hope that he takes action to change the situation. But you can also choose to do your own behavior. For example, you can profile yourself differently by making more substantive proposals, by taking more personal responsibility within projects and by proposing to your manager what training or education you would like to follow in order to progress to a managerial position. So you take the initiative for change yourself. That must make an impression within the organization.

Keep in mind that others can also react negatively to your change. Because if you start behaving yourself differently, it will affect the people around you. And not everyone likes changes.

How do we work on change?

You want to change, but how? It starts with becoming aware of the need for change to achieve your goals. To this end, we collect insights and experiences. We do this by actively mapping out your situation by to move and too look. Based on that knowledge, we look for the solution. The changes that are needed and the steps you need to take to bring about the change. And that necessary change is what we're doing it for!

You are an entrepreneur and things have not been going well lately. The number of customers is decreasing and your motivation continues to decrease. You want to turn the tide, but you have no idea how. You are in your hair with your hands. If we map the situation, it appears that your target group has changed, but you do not know how to communicate with them. By putting yourself in them you discover that there would be a problem, where you can find them and how to address them. You will also discover that you may be missing a product that matches a problem that the target group has. You put yourself back on the market and the number of customers increases again.

You can work on any change through a targeted approach. Do you dare to take that step?

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1 thought on “De wens om te veranderen”

  1. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this,
    like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that
    you could do with some pics to drive the message home a bit, but instead of that, this is wonderful
    blog. A fantastic read. I'll certainly be back.

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